I was closed off for a good part of my life when I was younger. I was blind to this fact too.
People have always been open with me since I remember and I thought I was open with them too. They talked, I listened and I never said much. I got away with listening and I probably still could get away with it because so many people want to be heard. On occasion I would minimally reciprocate my experiences but rarely my feelings.
It wasn’t until college, that I didn’t want to listen as much as I wanted to speak equally and be heard.
One of the best things in the world is when someone understands you, your feelings, experiences or your feelings in relation to your experiences.
It’s a blessing to know you are not alone. Vulnerability revealed that gift to me. Many of my current friends are the most aligned with me and who I am. They understand different aspects of myself, but one particular friend understands many of my experiences and feelings, than any friend I’ve known. He is my mirror.
It is common to get impatient when we see parts of ourselves in others that is hard for us to love or that we feel we need to work on within ourselves. However, my friendship with him is full patience and kindness. We hold space for each other, the same space that I have given so many throughout my life has been reciprocated through him and it brought deeper understanding with why a lot of my friends feel safe with me.
We are open and honest; I am the most open and honest with him. I tend to hold my breath when I speak certain truths to anyone including him. I always exhale when he says “I understand”.
In my times of fear and doubt, he lifts me up. While my friends believe in me, he believes in me in a deeper way than I have experienced. It sometimes feels like he knows something about me and my future that I don’t know or can’t see within me. When I talk about my goals he supports me like it already happened. It always catches me off guard. I even found a deeper belief in myself as a result of his belief in me. He is my Believing Mirror.
“‘Believing Mirrors’ are people who mirror us back to ourselves as powerful, strong, and in our most positive light.” (Julia Cameron Live).
Today I am thankful for my believing mirror for mirroring back the most positive version of myself that I don’t always see. I am thankful for his friendship and the ways I have grown as a result of him and our friendship.
Do you have a believing mirror in your life? I would love to hear about him or her in the comments below.
L0ve, Stephanie XO