Each fall and spring I look forward to working with at-risk teens through an arts non-profit. This program is a highlight of the season. I have been working with the group for three years. This year I decided to step back.
This past fall I worked on one of the most demanding, stressful and challenging movies. Plus my weekends were filled with either classes, service or family commitments. I barely had time to rest and decompress, I was consistently tired and I had limited time to run basic errands.
As the Spring session approached, this year, I foresaw the potential for Spring to be just as busy as this past fall. Outside of the non-profit, there are many commitments I have, on top of my own needs to focus on my health. I decided to step back this season to rest and use this time to continue to make strides towards my greater vision.
If I don’t carve this time out and really work towards my deepest dreams, I may be here longer than I want to be.
I know I made the right choice, because I feel at ease.
After I made my decision, I voiced the mantra align me with my purpose.
This past weekend I attended a facilitator training which taught me a new form of how to communicate in group settings and how to facilitate healthy, mindful communication among people. As I sat in the workshop, I was growing with excitement because what I was learning will help the next set of teens I work with and help me beyond that with the people I wish to serve in my future. I saw so many possibilities. The greatest possibility was how the skills can help me in my daily life.
Not to sound cliche or dramatic, but in honesty and truth, that training changed my life. Something shifted in me that I felt as I grew through the weekend.
I had started to close my heart. Part of my exhaustion and health concerns evolves around my energy. I care too much and sometimes I wish I didn’t. I really, wish I didn’t. For many reasons and for the past few months I have stepped back from my relationships to simply rest and slow down.
The intention I set for the program was to learn skills to help me with my greater vision, but the personal intention I set was to help me here and now.
I realized this weekend and asserted to my fellow workshop participants something that I never have never said out loud.
Through the workshop, I had a full weekend to myself, away from technology and noise where my life became clear. “I am ready to lead.”
I realized this assertion as it rolled off my tongue.
My feeling of stagnation and relative patience I thought was me waiting for the universe. The universe was waiting patiently for me. It needed me to accept what I needed to accept to move forward with out resistance.
I am ready. I am ready. I am ready. I am humbled and excited for what I has been calling me and what I am calling into my life.
Take a step back when you can and as often as you need. It just might change your life or change your perspective.
Love – Stephanie XO
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