The Next Time You Fail, Try This.

I tried. I failed. I was devastated. When I left my career in 2018, I followed what I felt was my calling. The road has not been easy. It has been filled with a lot of twists and turns.

After almost two years of schooling, I flushed out my idea and felt grounded in research. I decided to take a risk and share my business idea for a school competition. My presentation was solid; but during the Q & A portion I fell short. In the moment I knew I wasn’t going to win. I didn’t win. I didn’t even place, but there are gifts in failure.

Sit with your emotion.

 I first had to sit with disappointment. I’ve been studying somatic psychology, which focuses on somatic experience. I have learned that it is important to allow and experience emotions when they arise. Not all environments are appropriate to express certain emotions. And not all people are willing or able to sit with you in your emotional experience. When you are able to feel your emotions do it because it will have an impact on your long-term health.

Photo by Kat Jayne on

Notice your thoughts, but do not become attached to them.

As I sat with failure I witnessed my ego doing it’s job to keep me safe, by flooding my mind with negative thoughts that circled around self judgment from my idea to my ability and questioning my actions and decision to take this risk in the first place.  

Our body is wired for our survival. When we try and fail our ego tells us negative things so that we don’t try or take risks, because it compares failure with being unsafe. When failure happens, rather do what you can to witness them and do not believe negative thoughts as truth.

Identify the wisdom and blessings of failure.

As I reviewed my failure I acknowledge my passion for this work. I acknowledge how far I have come since I started. I was even grateful to see my friends and family come together to cheer me on and lift me up.

Try again.

Once you have processed your set back. Get back up and recommit to your goal and yourself. If you struggle with this step reach out to a friend or mentor for support or guidance to help you approach your goal with new eyes and in a new way. In time, you will reach your destination.

What was a valuable lesson you learned from failure? Or what is a lesson that you wish you learned? Share your wisdom in the comments below.

Love, Stephanie – XO

I appreciate your words. Thank you!

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