I’ve been thinking about darkness a lot lately.

We fear the dark when we are kids because we imagine that there are monsters in our closets or under our beds. As adults we out grow those childhood fears and illusions.

Last year was a tough year each step of the way. Going into the year I had one of my favorite and one the best jobs I have ever had. I was beyond blessed to work with my boss, I learned a lot and we did work that mattered. When work dried up, I lost my job. I saw it coming, but I hoped for the best. I found myself at ground zero needing to start over for a third time.

The next thing I know, another dream job fell into my lap, or so I thought. It was the answer to my oldest prayer, a set 9-5 job which is a stark contrast to the freelance 10 – 12 hour work days that I have known since college. This “dream job” was anything but easy, I worked around the clock. The job not only drained my energy, but it started to drain my soul too.

I was in darkness. Pure. Black. Darkness. I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel. I did not know what to do next. That fall of 2014, I surrendered to the Universe. In my mind surrender was the answer to a season of storms in my life, but to the universe I relinquished control of my life. Last year was nothing but the universe teaching me to trust it fully and completely. I GET IT!

The hardship of last year has made this year smooth. It is easier for me to trust and be patient that my life will continue to work out in my favor.

There is always light in darkness, but sometimes that light is a feeling.

Today’s Tune Tuesday song spoke to me when I found my voice over two years ago. The song however best speaks to me now. Trusting your path in the darkness, with only your beating heart to guide you and a reminder that you are alive.

Love – Stephanie XO

Wake Me Up – Avicii

Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beating heart
I can’t tell where the journey will end
But I know where to start
They tell me I’m too young to understand
They say I’m caught up in a dream
Well life will pass me by if I don’t open up my eyes
Well that’s fine by me

So wake me up when it’s all over
When I’m wiser and I’m older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn’t know I was lost

So wake me up when it’s all over
When I’m wiser and I’m older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn’t know I was lost

I tried carrying the weight of the world
But I only have two hands
I hope I get the chance to travel the world
And I don’t have any plans
I wish that I could stay forever this young
Not afraid to close my eyes
Life’s a game made for everyone
And love is a prize

So wake me up when it’s all over
When I’m wiser and I’m older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn’t know I was lost

So wake me up when it’s all over
When I’m wiser and I’m older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn’t know I was lost

I didn’t know I was lost
I didn’t know I was lost
I didn’t know I was lost
I didn’t know I was lost